80%

After my stay in the mental ward last summer, many people suggested I get re-evaluated by the VA. The main purpose being to get it annotated correctly on my records as PTSD and not simply depression. After completing “the process” known as the VA system it was annotated as PTSD with depression secondary to my nerve and cold weather injuries. They also changed my total disability rating from 70% to 80%. A few more dollars every month… just a little bonus? At first I thought so too, and it is but it also is not.

Lately it has kind of been messing with my head. I know all to well that I am not your “average Joe” due to my disabilities, but now there is a bigger number attached to them. If an average male my age is a 1 than I am capable of being a whopping .2. On a scale of 100 being average I am a 20. On most people’s scale of 1 – 10 I am now a 2 and there isn’t anything I can ever do to change that. I have tried my best over the years not to let my disabilities stop me from doing anything, but I have also learned that there are a lot of things that I am no longer capable of doing. There are still other things that are debatable on whether it is best for me to try, or simply pay someone else to do it for me.

The latest, and best example is I am going to change the windows on my house. 17 windows total. Do I pay $8,000 and spend two to three weeks killing my body to do them myself or pay $15,000 to have someone else do them in 3 -4 days? To most it would be worth saving the money and doing them themselves, but to me it is a much bigger debate than money.

Anywhos… till next time- Joe

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