Where is my happiness? Does it even exist?

I don’t think it’s in religion, for I spent many many years trying to find it in this

Is is in a lover? A soulmate? A friend?

These too I have tried and all simply come to an unhappy end

Can I find it within myself? Is it buried deep inside me?

Surely I would have found it by now. For I have searched tirelessly to see what I could see

Is it in a bottle? A needle? A drug?

Sometimes it feels as if all I really need is a tender embrace of a warm hug

Can it be in a self help book? A simple written plan from someone else to be my guide?

We are all judged by what others can physically see and not what is on the inside

How did I become so messed up? So alone? Or was I always this way?

Most of the time it is difficult to find even a semblance of a different day

Have I given too much of myself? Have I lost myself? Am I to blame?

No matter what I do or say it always causes others problems or more shame

Am I an outcast? A demon? Am I simply a messy ink blot?

We all have our differences, our scars. Some visible and some not

Do I try and hide it? Even from myself? Can I live in the bubble?

The bubble where everything is picture perfect and no sign of rubble

Can anyone understand who I really am? Can I even understand my own being?

There have been so many turns on the road of life, even the gravel road, I am no longer seeing


One comment on “Happiness?

  1. merbear74 says:

    “We are all judged by what others can physically see and not what is on the inside.”

    Truer words were never written. I can offer a virtual hug.


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