Heard this one?

 I heard this one today. Not only am I reminded of fact that some gave all…all gave some, but also the fact that many people never seem to realize. That is even though most make it back, no one ever makes it back the same. No matter where, or what you’re job was, simply deploying somewhere forever changes each and everyone. Hope you all enjoy. I have heard it before just made a special impact on me today.

Hard to do the right thing

I learned yesterday why it is that most people hard do the right thing. It is not the decline of morals, ethics, or an unwilling to try. It is simply because it is hard, takes effort, and most importantly time. In this modern era of technology people seem like they are more concerned with what is happening on the interweb. I am guilty of this sometimes also. Some people make me look like I am trapped back in the stone age. While racing was going on saturday night I saw more people playing on their phones then were watching the race. I am sure a few of them had legit reasoning, but not that many. Why pay to go somewhere if you are just going to play with your phone the whole time? To top it this was on the pit side, which is not the normal $13 to get in its $25 unless you are the drive for which you and the car are $40.

Anyhow I was selling an item on craigslist for a whopping $30. This one couple came and got it Sunday night after I had taken it apart for them. The next afternoon they learned it was kind of confusing to put together so they texted me. I tried to help as much as I could through texts, but they still could not get it together. They seemed surprised when I offered to come over and help put it back together again. (even though it was not Humpty Dumpty) I got the address and headed off into the 90 degree afternoon. Upon arriving it took me about 45 minutes to get it back together for them. This played havoc on my leg pain and I left and headed for work.

I am not telling this to brag or anything like that. It was remarkable how many comments they had about being surprised I even answered the texts, let alone actually helped them out. I simply stated I would like someone else to do the same for me. This got me to pondering if anyone actually would? I have had pretty good luck with buying and selling things on craigslist. Maybe I am one of only a limited few? I did my my lemon of a car from there. When I tried to contact the seller his phone had been disconnected and even the apartment, where I went to see it, was empty. I have since turned the lemon into the best lemonade a 92 Ford Tempo can be made into, but not without a lot of effort and expense.

So back to the title of this post. Most people choose not to do the right thing because it takes time. People seem to really dislike using their time for something other than what they would want to do. People choose not to because it takes effort from something that they deemed better deserving of their energy. People seem to be trapped so much in their own reality they usually miss the real one passing by. It is really cool how surprised people are when you simply want to help them. Whether it’s changing a tire, putting together an item they purchased from you, or even picking up hitch hikers it makes a difference to someone. I am not suggesting everyone has to do these things, but we all need to at least do something. I know I can never change the world for every person, but even if only for a moment maybe I can change one person’s world.

today’s venting

I have been working on about 3 different post that I was wanting to share. That all changed today when I attempted to finish one. I simply could not find any words to write with. They all seem to fail in that which I am trying to describe. As per the usual, things are not going the greatest for me. I am trying to get my disability through the VA increased, but the guy who was supposedly helping me, is “out of the office indefinitely”. So i get to start all over again at the end of Sept. The changes to my medications are having minimal effect helping me. They take the pain down a notch two at best, but it is still overwhelming. One of the side effects is that I feel high for a couple hours a day. Not sure if thats something I should enjoy or be afraid of when I am trying to run a machine? I am frustrated to say the least in many areas. Everyone tells you that they want to hear what you are feeling, but the reality is that they don’t give a flying rats behind. Especially if you opinion is different than theirs. I have learned numerous times over the years that it is best not to have any feelings or opinion. It is best just to agree with someone instead of going through the emotional beat down that may follow if you don’t. I know I am sensitive, but I have learned through all my trials and tribulations how to put up my walls to protect my sensitive side. There’s another. Everyone says that you should try and take down your emotional walls. Why? So I am vulnerable to attack? So that anyone can waltz up and do whatever the heck they want? No thanks, I have been through all that too many times as well. In even better news, I am continuing to lose weight. I had some to spare, but not a lot. I also had a crying spell today for the first time since they upped my antidepressant/ PTSD medication. Another one that tweaks my melon is everyone says hang in there we all go through rough times, and it will pass. How long does one have to be going through something rough for it to be over, or pass? 1 year? 5 years? 10? What about those that cannot get out of, or over their predicament for their entire lives no matter how hard they try? Anyhow thanks for reading my vent for today. I should get something else done. I am definitely looking forward to the hope that my racecar will run better on saturday night. Last race, about 3 weeks ago, it was acting like it was running out of gas yet ran another 15 laps. It had also been not wanting to restart after it got warm. I am hoping the two are connected because I changed the fuel filter, cleaned the injectors, and adjusted the throttle body. I ran it in the garage and got it warm and it restarted every time. It is not like I can really go for a test drive around town before hitting the track. So I guess I shall wait and see and hope for the best. I also picked up a new motor. After I rebuild it and put it in it will give me another 40HP for next year. Top 5 here I come? who knows gotta try. It is kind of funny and cool at the same time. When I am racing I get to escape my reality, even if only for a little while. I don’t have to deal with my many issues and my leg doesn’t hurt. I did have to put in a brace so I wouldn’t pop it out of gear around the turns without my knowing it, but no feeling of pain. It is a little difficult to get going. It’s a manual transmission, which is hard enough to drive, but try doing it with just your left leg.  This has been a rant…. it has only been a rant… had it been a real posting I would have hopefully written something better. Till next time…. Joe

New diet trend

Well ladies and gentlemen I have found the latest and greatest diet trend that is about to throw everyone a curve. IMPORTANT DISCLOSURE… The following diet trend is actually recommended to absolutely NO ONE EVER!!! Under any circumstances!!! To some it might even be considered bulimia or anorexia which is a disease. Unfortunately for me I cannot really do anything to change it right now. In what is usually my best time of year. The time where I feel the best thanks to the warm weather I continually slide down hill quickly. Usually October through April is the worst, this year I have continued to go downhill since October. I did expect this, in time, just not for another 8- 10 years. I continue to be in so much pain I can hardly keep down a snack thanks to the nauseaness. Let alone an entire meal in these dog days of summer where we have been in the low to mid 90’s for about a week or so now. Luckily for me, as compared to most, I really cannot complain. One I actually like the heat, two we have little to no humidity, and it is never extreme. 

I have also learned that I am kind of stuck in lala land. I have decided to be re-evaluated through the VA in hopes of getting my percentage of disability uped. This is mainly due to my little hospital stay and my continual struggle to keep working. The down side is realistically even as bad as I have become I will only get about 90%. I can apply for unemployability. The only downside is I cannot be working. So what do I do in the 8 – 16 months this is probably going to take.

Anyhow I am headed to Seattle tomorrow morning. I cannot wait for wounded warriors soldier ride. Going to be nice to get away from pretty much everything for 4 days. How I will do on a couple days for bicycle riding is yet to be determined. See you all on the flip side. Joe